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Saturday, April 23, 2016

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It’s not what you are that counts, it’s what they think you are.”
- Andy Warhol

I wake up today
to put on my loincloth
of gray jersey
one of two I bought
at the big and Indian store

there are no feathers
falling to earth in front of me
for a headdress
so I will have to pretend
I'm not an Indian
I'm not
but that doesn't matter

my tomahawk quietly
dips into my raisin bran
so I have to be careful
not to scalp my lips

the lady sits on her porch
sending smoke signals
with her cigarette
telling me her husband
loves her in a special way
I made that up
I have no idea what she's saying

Some of us are going
to hunt buffalo
at the big box store
or the buffalo are going
to hunt us
like the stupid tourists
who get gored every year

I'm an old non-Indian
Nobody smokes a pipe with me
to ask my advice
I don't have a pipe
I hate smoking
and I know enough
never to give advice

when I ride a pony
the hair chafes my thighs
loincloths don't protect
like they should
Vaseline brand Beargrease
that'll help
I don't have a pony
but if I did
I'd still wear a loincloth
they're kinda sexy

today I will shoot arrows
to get food
the store hates it
when I hit the scanner strip
tearing it so the laser can't read it
I don't have a bow and arrow either

The neighbor's dog is barking
I think I'll cook it for dinner
No I just think it
I couldn't catch the damn thing
if I tried

The big hot ball
is setting in the west
so the day is over
I wish the kids wouldn't
burn their rubber balls
they smell terrible

Soon the stars will come out
and we'll sit around the fire
telling stories
It's the Tonight Show
I don't know who's on
I miss Dave


Barry G. Wick

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