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Monday, June 15, 2015

For the Longest Time

For the longest time nothing hurt
This is not talking about the kid life
with scraped knees or even the broken arm
or leg or stitches from some bigger than normal
cut on a finger slammed in a car door
or the knife you took out to play with
that suddenly became a knife
when it had been a toy before the gush

For the longest time crossing the street
was done with the light
never the jaywalking that others did
sure getting away with something like that
was possible in a short moment
when the brain says oh why not
and sure everything was pretty much
by the book as far as parents were concerned

The pain in this conversation isn't the kind
of pain that lasts a few days from a pulled
muscle playing footfall or the bruise
from falling on the playground
where you cried in front of your buddies
and never would do that again
as long as you lived until you found out
you were gonna live long and things wear

Now here comes the day when the morning
sun is way passed it's prime
when the afternoon is closing in
and you're sixty something waking up
when everything feels like a hammer
was used by all the black-eyed characters
in those dreams that stick beyond eyes open
the kind of dreams where walking doesn't hurt

The knee first or maybe the back and for some
it's a joint in the finger that goes raging
like a rabid dog howling foam
every direction just waiting to get shot
maybe its the cramps in a calf or stiffness
in that first knee and then the notice
everything is screaming at from toes to hair
when eyebrows drop down with a wince

These are the years beyond the time
when there was no pain that old people
talked about and others didn't hear their words
until those words slammed into an elbow
like a car door opened just as the bike
is ridden into it full speed ahead
the day beginning when every thought
drags these bear attacks just to the toilet then the sink

It all gets slow like the dark piece of cloth
paused in thought as a bug on the carpet
stared at it for ten minutes just to make sure
no legs are moving no fingers moving
when the big toe on the left foot
starts throbbing to no radio song that just stepped
on a knitting needle which jumped up
through the ceiling in the basement

Old men say old age isn't for sissies
but maybe all this happens to a sissy
not in the too prissy kind kind where things were
softer in every moment of that softer or juicy
peaches kind of life when everything tasted sweet
now it's here and what has got to be done
has to be done or it going to look pretty grim
around the edges here or smell of urine

When the kitchen is in front of the pains
even standing can be just awful on the hips
dishes don't do themselves and first meds
gotta be downed before anything remotely
caloric slips passed the tongue into the genuine
pit of a painful stomach that hurts beyond
the first fart of the day when it seemed relief
but didn't last long enough kind of pain

So maybe expectations of these horrors
would end huh and while being dragged
though these events wasn't a first choice
in reading it sorta got some attention
that something worthy would end this
parade of dog teeth sinking into live bone
oh please do walk away painless because
nobody wants this ever ever for the longest time

Barry G. Wick

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